2.13.2007: The Door of Opportunity

The Guy and a Door.

It’s a rather impressive door. Tall, carved with intricate detail, the kind of door that obviously guards something very very important.

And the door has a face. Which, at the moment, is immobile.

The Guy considers the door.

The Brother enters.

THE GUY
Hey.

THE BROTHER
Oh, hey. What are you doing?

THE GUY
Checking out this door. I haven’t seen it here before.

THE BROTHER
This door?

THE GUY
Yes. This door.

THE BROTHER
Oh. It’s the Door of Opportunity.

THE GUY
Really?

THE BROTHER
Yeah. The Door of Opportunity. You open it, and there… inside…

THE GUY
… is Opportunity.

THE BROTHER
You got it.

A silence.

THE GUY
That’s a heavy-handed metaphor.

THE BROTHER
Look. I’m not writing this play. You are. And let’s be honest here. Don’t you want Opportunity to be this freakin’ obvious? Don’t you? Doesn’t everyone? I mean wouldn’t it be nice if you were just walking through your life, wondering what the hell you were going to do with the next forty years of it and WHAM! suddenly in the middle of everything there’s this. This DOOR! I mean, it would make life so much easier, don’t you think?

THE GUY
Good point.

THE BROTHER
So are you gonna open it?

THE GUY
I don’t know. I haven’t decided.

They stand there a minute, contemplating the Door.

Finally:

THE DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY
I’M THE FUCKING DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY, YOU DUMB SHIT! OPEN ME!

The two of them are startled.

THE BROTHER
The Door of Opportunity isn’t very nice.

THE DOOR OF OPPORUNITY
I don’t have time for nice. I have things to do.

THE GUY
Sorry.

THE DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY
Whatever. So are you going to open me or not?

THE BROTHER
I think you should do it.

THE GUY
Yeah?

THE BROTHER
I did. I had a wonderful time. I got to do more things that I ever thought I would. I did what I wanted to do. Now… it’s your turn.

THE DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY
Come on. Open me.

The Guy goes to the Door of Opportunity. He opens it.

The lights go down.