Two actors stand side by side– The Husband and The Wife.
They begin by speaking over one another, animated, wide-eyed, excited.
They stop, and The Husband speaks.
THE HUSBAND
This house was built in 1975, but the plumbing was redone last year. The entire system.
THE WIFE
He only ever talks about the house.
THE HUSBAND
I had a man replace the roof about a year ago.
THE WIFE
From the day we moved in here. Whenever he meets someone new…
THE HUSBAND
The landscaping was done by this friend of a guy I work with. Well regarded professional. He’s done the yards of some pretty important people.
THE WIFE
…He talks about the house.
THE HUSBAND
We plan on replacing all the carpeting with hardwoods floors by the end of the year.
THE WIFE
I hate the house.
THE HUSBAND
The wife loves the house.
THE WIFE
I want to burn the thing to the ground.
THE HUSBAND
A man’s home is his castle, you know. That’s what they say about a man’s home. It’s his castle.
THE WIFE
The money we’ve poured into the place. The time.
THE HUSBAND
I painted the exterior myself. Did it on a Sunday.
THE WIFE
The investment of ourselves.
THE HUSBAND
We’ve talked about adding an extension out back, but that’s just talk right now.
THE WIFE
He’s becoming the house.
THE HUSBAND
Make a little game room or something out back.
THE WIFE
I look at him, and his eyes are shaped like windows. His mouth is the big red door that faces our street.
THE HUSBAND
Maybe a nursery. For a kid. When we’re ready to have one.
THE WIFE
The hair he has left is the color of our new roof.
THE HUSBAND
But we have to have a home that’s ready for a family. Before we even start talking about kids.
THE WIFE
And at night, when he’s sleeping, he’s as still as the walls, and I imagine his blood running through veins that are little hallways trimmed in beige – just like ours.
THE HUSBAND
I love this house.
THE WIFE
Love me instead.
THE HUSBAND
I love this house.
THE WIFE
Love me instead.
THE HUSBAND
I love this house.
THE WIFE
I’d burn it to the ground if I could.
For the first time, The Husband turns to The Wife. She is momentarily caught off guard, but regains herself and smiles a perfect smile.
He takes her hand. And looks forward again.
Her smiles begins to show signs of strain.
The lights go down.
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